There is a type of habit called a ‘cornerstone habit’. It is the habit that in addition to its own effect leads to the adoption of other seemingly unrelated habits. Cornerstone habits, just like all habits, can be beneficial or detrimental. The main difference is that a cornerstone habit is 100 times more beneficial or detrimental than a regular habit.
Mindful eating is turning out to be one of the most beneficial cornerstone habits I have ever adopted in my life.
It has been 3 weeks of eating without any distraction. And in addition to the greater pleasure I now derive from food (much less food too), I have also begun noticing interesting changes in my psyche that are quite profound.
- I became more mindful of when I am hungry, stressed or sad.
In the past, I did not pay much attention to my physical sensations or emotional state, most likely because I could simply soothe myself with the mindless ‘food + entertainment’ combo without really paying attention to what’s wrong. Now that I am fully present when I eat, I notice my physical and emotional state while I am eating, listen to my thoughts and observe my cravings.
Sometimes I do not give in to those cravings, sometimes I do. I have noticed that if I let myself get very hungry and/or sleep-deprived, it is much MUCH harder to not give in to cravings, even when I am mindful. This made me pay more attention to my sleep patterns and eating protein when hungry.
Still, even when I do give in and have my treats, I get satisfied (or disillusioned, if I expect to feel emotionally better) faster and with much less food because I am paying attention to the experience.
Because of that…
2. I am much better at handling negative emotions and being alone with my thoughts.
Whereas in the past I would have been eating + watching a mindless show for awhile before realising that I must be anxious or sad, now I realise it sooner and have been finding alternative – and far more effective – ways of dealing with these emotions and thoughts. For example, journaling, walking in nature or just outside, doing a kettlebell workout, cleaning, meditation and even getting some work done which I might have been avoiding.
In the past, it would be very difficult for me to switch off the YouTube talk or an audiobook and experience silence, both inner and outer. But now that I have been eating in complete silence for 3 weeks, I realized that I have been missing out before. The variety of sensations, the peace of focusing on just one thing, and the amount of unexpected creative ideas and profound realizations that come floating into my mind are incredible. This focus on experience and allowing the thoughts to wander as they will, seem to help me be less anxious, and resolve conflicts much faster when in the past I would avoid them by escaping into my food+media cave.
3. I have been making better choices in other areas of life, like financial spending, because I have realised how much being mindful affects my choices for the better.
I realised that shopping and listening to an audiobook leads to impulsive buys. So my finances have been better.
4. I know my taste better and buy more delicious and less disappointing foods.
One of the reasons mindless eating actually worked for me (or supposedly worked) was to help me choke down ‘healthy’ food that I made myself eat because health is really important to me. So I would mindlessly eat bland boring ‘healthy’ food and then mindlessly eat ‘fun’ food. I could eat literally anything to the tune of a fascinating YouTube discussion, an audiobook or a movie.
Since I separated food and entertainment, I became very aware of how bland, boring and unappealing many of my meals were and I couldn’t choke them down anymore. So I began exploring what I actually like, and surprisingly, there are many healthy foods I absolutely love eating. For example, microgreen salads with tomatoes, seeds and roasted chickpeas dressed with olive oil and apple cider vinegar – can’t get enough of them! Raw coconut – yum! Slow-cooked lamb hearts dipped into wasabi horseradish – I’m in heaven!
5. I hardly ever crave junk food anymore.
Since I now enjoy my regular meals immensely, I don’t seem to feel as much need for ‘party food’. In fact, I have been really astonished at how much my desire for unhealthy junk food reduced. I still have ‘a party in the mouth’ on a weekly basis when I go to a restaurant for my Deep and Meaningful Conversation meetup. But it has been really interesting to notice what treat foods I actually like when I am not distracted by entertainment. Most of all I like ice cream or greek yoghurt with berries, especially when combined with a warm slice of chocolate brownie on the side. But even in that, I noticed a strong preference to the quality of ingredients whereas in the past I would have just gobbled any old junky sugar fix.
I remember a couple of months ago my friend Cait and I were shopping for icecream. She bought high-quality gourmet icecream which cost twice the price of my giant budget box of icecream. At my incredulity with her willingness to spend more for less, she said that when the ice cream quality is good, you don’t need much quantity to satisfy you. I know that concept and I can apply it to other things, but not to ice cream. Ice cream was absolutely about quantity for me! Until now. It seems I am now experiencing viscerally what she means and really enjoying better quality icecream in much smaller but oh-so-delightful amounts.
6. It is getting much much easier to eat – and do other things – mindfully.
Whereas in the first week of this new resolution it was really tough to force myself to sit down for a meal without listening to something, now it is much easier. The other day, I was on autopilot listening to a YouTube talk when I sat down for a meal. Upon eating my first morsel, I realised something didn’t feel right – I did not feel connected to my food, I actually couldn’t taste it properly! Immediately I noticed that I was still listening to the talk, whipped off the headset, removed the phone and returned to my – much more satisfying – eating experience.
That was a huge revelation. I can’t believe how much sensation and enjoyment I was missing out on all these years.
Not only that, but I now enjoy washing the dishes and cooking mindfully. I find it easier to recognize when I need to turn off an audiobook and process my thoughts on the subject, or on an unrelated issue. I think all of that is to do with an awareness that I can not only handle the stream of my own thoughts and emotions in the silence of everyday living, but that mindfully experiencing those seemingly mundane realities actually reveals the meaning and profundity of life.
7. I have been feeling more grateful and positive too. About everything.
Since eating mindfully makes me sit and appreciate food, I realised that when I take time to appreciate things in my life, I am happier, more content and more productive.
What a hell of a cornerstone habit, huh!